"BLINK"

I've not had a lot of time to enjoy one of my favorite pastimes- reading. With work, motherhood, studying for Private Pilot Exam and GRE's and hobbies consuming much of my time, I just haven't been able to squeeze in a good book.

Last night, after studying, I hungered for a book to read for pleasure. I grabbed Blink by Malcolm Gladwell off my shelf. What a great read so far! It's a book about making sophisticated judgement in a short time based on experiences, "hunches" or "intuition" if you may.

I'm at the Theory of Thin Slices - "the ability of our unconscious to find patterns in behaviours based on slices of experience". One of the examples was a Psychologist who could predict with 95% accuracy whether a couple would still be married fifteen years later. There is a mathematical process that he uses but essentially, he focuses on what he calls the Four Horseman: defensiveness, stonewalling, criticism, and contempt.

"Contempt" being the single most important sign that a marriage is in trouble. By measuring contempt, you could make an assumption on the nature of any relationship. Since contempt is related to disgust or a statement made from a superior level such as (his example) "You are a bitch. You're scum". With contempt, one is degraded and made to be inferior. I found myself agreeing with him. In any relationship, once you cross the name calling put-down stage, "respect" is lost. And its all downhill after that.

Another interesting example was speed dating. In a nutshell, what we think we want on the spur of the moment is susceptible to outside influences. He gives an example of "Mary" who comes to the speed dating event with a pretty good idea of what traits she desires in a person. But while in a roomful of men, she finds herself completely changing her mind and falling for other traits. But taken out of this environment, she switches back to her original desired traits. Does she not know what she wants or is it that she is uncertain about the criterias she uses to form her preferences, as the author states.

Lots more examples that will leave you wondering how you make decisions... and if at times, were the irrational, quick judgements the best decisions you've made??